


Quality Time

by shinyopals



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor, POV Tony Stark, Pre-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), ~there's only one bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 10:30:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14211216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinyopals/pseuds/shinyopals
Summary: Tony attempts his most charming smile all over again. ‘Good news is, we’ve got more than enough oxygen, water and food to last the, ah-’ he coughs, then mumbles the rest, ‘twenty-four hours it’ll take Jarvis to brute-force the security from the outside and release us.’Pepper’s head shoots up. ‘Howlong?’Tony would normally be thrilled to spend 24 hours trapped in a bunker with Pepper. Unfortunately things don't always work out exactly the way he wants them to.





	Quality Time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [firstofoctober](https://archiveofourown.org/users/firstofoctober/gifts).



> From a prompt from [firstofoctober](https://archiveofourown.org/users/firstofoctober): "Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while…"
> 
> And thank you again to [niobium](https://archiveofourown.org/users/niobium) for the beta read!

‘Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while,’ says Tony. ‘Seems like there’s just a little… tiny bug in the security system.’ He smiles winningly before remembering she can’t see his face.

‘So I’d guessed,’ says Pepper. She crosses her legs where she’s sitting, still looking pristine for the flight she’s now going to miss. Tony winces. She’s using _that_ tone.

Tony glances at the displays the suit is projecting and suppresses a sigh. He gestures minutely to make the suit unfold around him, and he steps out back into the room and attempts his most charming smile all over again. ‘Good news is, we’ve got more than enough oxygen, water and food to last the, ah-’ he coughs, then mumbles the rest, ‘twenty-four hours it’ll take Jarvis to brute-force the security from the outside and release us.’

Pepper’s head shoots up. ‘ _How_ long?’

‘Uh,’ says Tony. ‘So this state-of-the-art safe-house I built was designed to withstand-’

‘I have a meeting with the prime minister of Japan the day after tomorrow, Tony-’

‘-attacks from any number of murderous supervillains, including-’

‘-where we could potentially sign a multi-billion dollar energy deal with-’

‘-rogue AIs, technologically superior aliens, mad scientists-’

‘-the Japanese government. If you make me late for it and this deal falls through-’

‘-so actually, now that I think about it, it’s doing exactly what I designed it to-’

‘-we’re going to have to lay-off-’

‘-so I think that counts as a win!’

‘-half our entire... _this is not a win, Tony_.’

‘Pep, honey, it’ll be fine,’ he says. He sits beside her and pulls her into him. ‘You hardly take any time off work. A day to recharge is just what you need. We should have more quality time together, really.’ It’s coming up to six months since Steve took down SHIELD and Hydra, and the Avengers are still as busy as ever. Sometimes it feels like he only sees Pepper at press conferences. He kisses her hair and moves his hands up to her shoulders to gently massage them. He can feel her beginning to soften slightly under his touch, but knows he’s not quite out of the woods yet.

‘A day locked in a bunker cut off from the outside world is not-’

‘Uh, technically it’s not a bunker, it’s a prototype next-generation safe-apartment, able to withstand roughly seventeen direct nuclear apocalypses on top of-’

‘I don’t need the marketing spiel to know it should not have locked us in for no reason. What I need, is to be on a plane to Japan.’

‘Of course you do,’ he says. ‘And as soon as we’re out, we’ll take one of the Quinjets and I’ll fly you over in a couple of hours. Or you could jump in one of the suits,’ he adds, grinning to himself.

‘Funny, Tony,’ she says, but she leans into him at last and he sighs happily and nuzzles her hair. Even if they’re in a next-gen safe-house that’s completely cut off from the outside world, impossible even for the Avengers to penetrate, and almost definitely probably malfunctioning, he really doesn’t get enough time with Pepper in between her CEOing and him superheroing. 

There is, however, just the slight, unfortunate matter of-

‘You are correct, Stark,’ announces Thor behind them. 

Tony and Pepper both jump out of their skins at the sudden noise.

‘Jeez, big guy, _how_ are you so silent when you walk?’ demands Tony. ‘You’re, like, two tonnes.’

Thor strides in and drops himself onto the couch on the other side of Pepper. ‘It is strongly built with no other doorways. Though if I summoned Mjolnir I am confident I would be able to break down the walls, as your guest, Stark, it would be impolite to do so when you have requested otherwise.’ 

‘Yes, I’d rather you not punch a bunch of holes in my stuff,’ said Tony. The definitely-not-a-bunker is surrounded by a lot of sensitive equipment for testing purposes so he doesn’t think a bit of patience is too much to ask.

Shrugging agreeably, Thor pulls his cell out of his pants pocket and began to fiddle, then frowns and shakes it a few times. Tony rolls his eyes. 

‘Yeah, uh, there’s no internet in here,’ he says. ‘By design,’ he adds, when Thor frowns. ‘In case some artificial intelligence takes over the internet and tries to kill us all. This place is meant to be safe from that. For the people who aren’t fighting.’

‘Who’s not fighting?’ asks Thor.

‘Uh, Pepper? Jane, maybe?’

‘Oh, Jane would fight,’ says Thor cheerfully. ‘It was her bravery that defeated Malekith the Accursed and the Aether and saved all the Nine Realms from a future of darkness and desolation.’

‘Yes, I remember,’ says Tony with gritted teeth, because Thor’s only mentioned it about nine million times. ‘The point is, not everyone wants to be out in the danger.’ He’s not sure he does, most of the time. ‘So. Bunker. That’s not a bunker. It’s more of an apartment. Surrounded by armour and shielding so most people won’t be able to punch their way out. Or in, rather, since the point is to keep them out.’

‘How’s the rest of it, Thor?’ asks Pepper. ‘I haven’t looked around to see how much space we’ve got.’

‘Very little,’ says Thor. ‘There are washing facilities, a small cooking room, store cupboards, and various machinery. One was a generator of power. I did not recognise the rest.’

‘Water recycler, air recycler and temperature controls, shielding-’ begins Tony.

‘No bedroom?’ interrupts Pepper.

Thor shakes his head and looks at Tony questioningly. So does Pepper.

‘Uh,’ says Tony. ‘This is a pull-out couch.’

Pepper stares at him.

‘Look, this is a prototype. It’s not finished. I haven’t exactly got to the interior decor stage! It’s just a proof of concept.’ 

‘Well so far the concept is getting a C minus,’ says Pepper archly. ‘One bed? One pull out couch bed? For _three_ of us?’

‘Jarvis, mark 1 testing notes: bigger bed. And second bed.’

‘Indeed, Sir,’ comes the voice from the suit, apparently unflappable despite having lost his connection to the outside world.

Tony mentally curses Thor’s existence. He could definitely spend a pleasant twenty-four hours isolated from the outside world with Pepper. He could even make her dinner, since all of the food is dried, in tin cans, or MREs courtesy of the military, and he’s pretty sure even he can’t screw those up too badly. (Rhodey’s recommended the jambalaya, although Tony isn’t completely sure if that was a genuine recommendation or Rhodey intentionally being an asshole.)

Instead he’s stuck in a definitely-not-a-bunker, sharing a pull-out couch with an alien who barely even fits in a normal king.

‘I will make myself comfortable on the floor when it comes time to sleep,’ says Thor.

‘Yes! Good!’

‘He’s a guest, Tony,’ says Pepper. ‘Don’t be rude. This floor is solid concrete. I’m sure we can all share if it comes to it. We’re all adults.’

‘This is punishment for something I’ve done, isn’t it?’

‘What could you _possibly_ have done, I wonder?’ says Pepper. 

Tony pouts at her, but since he’s been doing that for almost as long as he’s known her and now she’s his girlfriend and not his PA, she feels even less obliged to give ground. By rights, Tony is pretty sure, it should work the other way around.

‘I think I saw a set of playing cards in my exploration,’ says Thor, getting to his feet. ‘Would you care to play to pass the time? Jane has been teaching me poker.’

‘Has she now?’ says Tony.

Thor grins as he heads out the door. ‘Fear not, for she has also taught me the version where no removal of clothing is required. Unless,’ he adds, ‘you would prefer to play that way.’ He waggles his eyebrows and then disappears before Tony can respond beyond a splutter.

Pepper buries her face into Tony’s shoulder to suppress her laughter and Tony scowls down at her. He doesn’t mind that Thor is a massive flirt, not really, but he wishes he was a bit less indiscriminate in who he flirted with.

~*~

Thor plays poker like he fights: all high risks and raising the stakes and no apparent regard for the health of himself (or rather, his bank balance), but every so often with an unexpected bluff that nearly destroys everyone else. Pepper is much more cautious with her money (or in this case, the sugar, coffee, tea and other MRE packets that are subbing in for poker chips) making it harder for her to lose too much, but harder to win big either. Tony has spent more than enough time in casinos to be the best player there, but poker isn’t exactly his game of choice, and he’s used to deeper pockets than having an agreed upon allowance of sugar packets, so he’s not at his best. He still mostly wins, which is all that matters.

Eventually, they get hungry and make dinner. The kitchen equipment isn’t fully hooked up (‘It’s a prototype!’ Tony reminds them. ‘It’s not meant to be ready to use yet!’), so the self-heating MREs come in handy. 

‘Turns out Rhodey’s a liar,’ observes Tony, three bites in. He pinches his nose as he takes a fourth bite. 

‘The veggie omelet is all right,’ says Pepper. Tony leans over to look and gags.

‘It looks like-’

‘Don’t say it!’ she interrupts. She shuts her eyes as she takes another bite.

Thor snickers. He’s eating something that looks like dog food and on Tony’s incredulous glance, shrugs and says, ‘I’ve had worse.’

‘Do we even want to know?’ asks Pepper, who is probably thinking that right now she could be eating a freshly prepared meal from a menu designed by a three-Michelin-star chef on board her private jet. If she's not thinking that, then Tony definitely is. But on the off chance that she isn’t, he decides not to remind her.

‘Every realm has its own diet,’ says Thor. ‘Some are more suited to both my palate and my anatomy than others.’

‘OK, definitely do not need the details,’ says Tony. He prods at his jambalaya. ‘Jarvis, another testing note: Rhodey thinks he’s hilarious but is actually a liar and not to be trusted about the MREs. Further note: the food stinks. And we need alcohol. Like, a lot of alcohol. Something with a nice long shelf life.’

After dinner, bored of poker, bored of staring at the same four walls, and frustrated with the fact that he can’t just enjoy spending some enforced rest with Pepper, Tony begins to go over the bunker with a fine toothed comb. He’s not looking for a way out, since he knows the design and is pretty confident there isn’t one. Outside-Jarvis should be able to force an override eventually. But he needs to be doing something, and if nothing else it’s providing more testing notes for later. He discovers the hot water doesn’t work, the air conditioning looks like it won’t last beyond a week, and that (as expected) he still cannot penetrate (either physically or by hooking the suit and Jarvis up) the shield and defense controls.

‘Hope outside-Jarvis is having more luck,’ he says to the suit, which is housing inside-Jarvis and following him around.

‘Indeed, Sir,’ he replies. 

‘Is it weird, being cut off from him?’ Jarvis has had to be partitioned before, of course, but usually he’s had access to wifi and satellite signals, if not the rest of himself.

‘I’m not sure I’m programmed to feel ‘weirdness’, Sir,’ he points out politely.

Tony sighs and grumbles and resumes his work.

Eventually, with no success beyond another thirty or so notes of things to improve (and that’s before he’s even asked Pepper what she actually wants in safe house because he doesn’t think it’s a particularly great time to broach that question), he sends the suit packing to the corner and flops on the couch beside Pepper, putting an arm around her shoulders as he does. She leans into him and he likes the warmth, finding himself smiling despite everything.

‘How’re you feeling, hon?’ he asks.

‘I’ve been worse,’ she says, ‘but please make sure that the next version of this thing has some books or something.’

‘Already noted,’ he says. ‘Right, Jarvis?’ 

‘Testing notes four, five, six, twelve and twenty-three concern entertainment, Sir,’ says Jarvis.

‘Good start,’ says Pepper. She reaches over to take his free hand and pulls it around her middle. Tony squeezes, then kisses her temple, then remembers their audience and glances suspiciously at Thor. 

Thor is leaning back on the couch, gazing vaguely into the corner of the room with slightly glazed eyes. He seems to realise Tony’s attention is suddenly on him, though and he looks across and quirks an eyebrow.

‘I’m not going to go and sit on the floor of the washroom by myself,’ he says.

‘There’s always the kitchen,’ suggests Tony. He’s not being entirely serious, if only because he’s pretty confident that Pepper wouldn’t have sex with him even if Thor was in the kitchen.

Thor’s lip twitches and he resumes his gazing into nothing.

~*~

They make desultory conversation and mostly exist in a sort of unmoving boredom for a few hours. Pepper stays in his arms and they both successfully keep Thor off the topic of his many, many, _many_ war stories, and the great things Jane Foster has done lately. Even avoiding the war stories and Jane, it’s dull, but Tony hasn’t had much dull lately, especially not with Pepper, who still smells nice despite eating something for dinner that could charitably be described as looking like vomit. Eventually, though, they’re yawning enough that it feels like they should try to get some sleep.

‘I’m going to go and wash,’ says Pepper. 

‘We’ll sort the couch,’ says Tony, who has never operated a pull-out-couch in his life and is hoping it’s easy.

Thor picks off the couch cushions and pulls out a lever very cautiously, like it might break at any second. Which, given that it’s Thor, is probably sensible. Tony quickly busies himself finding sheets and blankets before Thor can ask him whether it’s the right lever. They really should have left this to Pepper. Thor, however, seems to know what he’s doing and has the bed unfolded in only moments.

‘Huh,’ says Tony. It’s not that it’s complicated. Probably not, anyway. He just doesn’t like it when Thor knows more about things than him.

‘Jane and I have slept on these before,’ says Thor by way of explanation. He takes the sheets from Tony and begins to speedily make up the bed. ‘I broke one in my early days on Midgard,’ he adds. ‘The metal framework is very easy to bend.’

‘Of course you did,’ says Tony. He begins to stuff pillows into cases. He isn’t used to having to prepare his own bed, but he can figure out this bit.

‘You know I will be perfectly comfortable on the floor,’ says Thor. ‘Pepper is kind, but the bed is small and I have slept on craggy rocks and up ice-covered peaks. Flat concrete will be comfortable by comparison.’

‘Yeah, uh, no can do,’ says Tony. ‘Pepper’s call. I know you can sleep on the floor. I know _I_ can sleep on the floor, if it comes to it. But if Pepper stays up all night because she feels bad about relegating either of us to the floor, she’ll be even more stressed tomorrow. So if she says bed, we’re in the bed.’

Thor laughs softly as he smooths and blankets in place. ‘I would not wish to distress Pepper,’ he says, ‘but I shall reassure her that it may be more comfortable for all of us if I take the floor.’

Tony looks down at the small bed and sighs. ‘Please do,’ he says. He doesn’t think Thor is likely to win. Pepper is too nice for that.

When Pepper reappears, fresh-faced and slightly damp around the edges, Tony gestures for Thor to go and, making use of the brief moment of privacy, pulls Pepper into his arms for a proper kiss. She smells like soap and tastes like toothpaste, which are at least two things Tony remembered to stock.

‘You all right?’ he asks.

‘Yeah, I’m fine,’ she says. ‘Just one night and we’re done, right?’

‘I hope so,’ says Tony. ‘Thor said sleeping on the floor is fine, by the way.’

‘We’re not making him sleep on the concrete!’ said Pepper. ‘It’s cold and drafty, not to mention uncomfortable.’

‘It wouldn’t really be making him if he’s volunteered,’ points out Tony, but it’s a losing battle. He looks down at the bed and grimaces again.

His eyes jump back to Pepper when she reaches to unzip her dress.

‘You- what are you-?’ 

‘If you think I’m sleeping in this you have another thing coming,’ she said. 

‘But-’

‘It is cut and sewn to keep me looking a certain shape, Tony, so it’s not comfortable enough to sleep in. _And_ it’s dry-clean only.’

She’s down to her underwear in moments and begins to peel off her pantyhose.

‘Pep-!’ he manages, shuffling awkwardly to stand between her and the door, worried Thor’s going to enter at any moment.

‘Shirt, please.’

‘What?’

‘I’m not sleeping in my dress, nor do I plan to keep my bra on, because have you ever tried to sleep with wire poking into you?’

‘Uh, yes. Literally yes.’

‘If you want Thor to walk in on me wearing just by underwear then by all means keep standing there doing nothing and don’t give me your shirt.’

‘Oh, right, yes, that!’ He yanks it over his head with alacrity and hands it over. 

Pepper whips her bra off and pulls his shirt over her head in almost the same movement, leaving Tony slightly disappointed at her efficiency. The shirt isn’t huge, but she’s slim enough that it’s not absurdly revealing, even if it only skims the tops of her legs. He pulls her in closer because they’re still alone and hopefully Thor will take another half hour on his hair. She’s always beautiful, but she’s a special kind of beautiful looking like this: hair loose and a little mussed, face free from make-up, wearing whatever she’s dragged out of the closet. He’s one of the precious few who get to see her like this and he loves it. 

‘You know, normally I’d be delighted to get you out of most of your clothes and wearing only some of mine,’ he says. ‘Tonight I’m worried I’m going to have to fight Thor if he looks at you funny.’

Pepper snorts softly. ‘I don’t think you have to worry,’ she says. ‘He flirts with you more than me.’ Tony huffs and is about to argue back when Pepper closes the distance between them for another kiss. 

Thor returns all-too-quickly, also clean and damp, and nods to Tony that the bathroom is his to use. If he notices Pepper’s undress, he doesn’t say anything, and his eyes don’t even flicker downwards.

In the bathroom, Tony scrubs his face and hair and then his upper body after giving his armpits a sniff and deciding it won’t hurt. He scowls at himself in the mirror as he does so, the cold water only making him feel chilled and uncomfortable. 

Under the harsh lighting, he looks pale, and compared to the superpowered alien he’s going to be stuck sharing a bed with, he feels scrawny and unattractive. It’s not a sensation he’s used to. He hasn’t felt unattractive since he got over the worst of puberty. He hasn’t needed to. He’s got a back catalogue of flings as long as the telephone directory; he receives a lot - seriously _a lot_ \- of inappropriate fanmail; and he’s got a number of “World’s Sexiest Man” style titles. Unfortunately, ever since Cap woke up and Thor arrived, he’s started to come in third on those ‘Sexiest Avenger’ polls. And it doesn’t matter: he hardly needs his ego to be constantly fed. It just comes rather sharply into focus when he’s stuck in a bunker with Pepper and Thor.

Back in the main room, Thor is down to his boxers and t shirt and is sitting on the end of the bed chatting with Pepper about a Frida Kahlo exhibit he went to, like this is completely normal. Because of course he is. 

Tony shakes his head and pulls off his jeans. ‘Since apparently keeping our clothes on would make this weird,’ he says. Thor snickers.

‘Oh, stop being silly,’ says Pepper. ‘We all need sleep. We might as well be comfortable. Where do you want on the bed?’

Tony spends a moment trying to work out if he’d rather be on the edge with a bit more space, or in the middle to make sure his girlfriend doesn’t get spooned by a thunder god. It doesn’t take him all that long to decide middle. Then Pepper crawls in on one side and Thor on the other and Tony sighs to himself.

‘We are never talking about this again,’ he says. ‘Lights please, Jarvis.’ They’re plunged into darkness.

A moment passes. Thor is runs warmer than a human and, despite his best efforts, is definitely taking up about half the space. Tony shuffles closer to Pepper until he’s almost on top of her. Then he shifts them, so she’s almost on top of him. It seems polite, after all.

‘Thor?’ says Pepper into the darkness.

‘Mmm?’ asks the mountain behind Tony.

‘Just so you know, if you steal all the blankets, I will kill you.’

‘I shall endeavour to be a considerate bed-partner,’ he says. ‘I like to think Jane would vouch for me on that front.’

Tony half-turns. ‘You know exactly what you’re saying and I hate you so much,’ he says.

He hears Thor’s muffled laugh and feels Pepper also hiding a giggle. For that, he pokes her ribs, and she yelps.

‘You’re both not as funny as you think you are,’ he says.

‘Go to sleep, Tony,’ says Pepper, and he’s about to argue that he _can’t_ because he’s got about four square inches of space, and a hot water bottle the size of a grizzly bear right behind him, and he’s trapped in a malfunctioning concrete box, and even his own brain is betraying him by sulking that _he’s_ not the size of a grizzly bear.

And then Pepper’s hand runs through his hair, ever so gently, and he feels the gust of her breath on his cheek and then the lightest press of her lips to his before it’s gone. Then he feels her hand trace out a circle in the centre of his chest, following the path of the scar they both know without needing to see. She flattens her hand over his heart. She does this, sometimes: grounds them both in the now by reminding him what he’s lost and gained. Proof he’s got a heart, he thinks, with a slight quirk of his lips, and he kisses where he knows her head must be and gets a mouthful of hair.

‘Love you, Pep,’ he whispers, as quietly as he can, because better to be here with her (even with the aforementioned grizzly-bear-sized-hot-water-bottle) than somewhere she’s not.

‘Love you too,’ she murmurs back, almost too quiet for him to hear.

Thor is fortunately either oblivious or polite enough to pretend to be, and that’s really all that Tony can ask for at that moment.

~*~

He wakes to a face full of blond hair. 

True blond, not strawberry blonde, and he groans when he remembers what happened and therefore whose hair it must be. They’ve shifted in their sleep. Of course. Pepper’s hand is around his waist and she’s nuzzled into his back. _Thor’s_ arm is thrown over his hips and is probably on Pepper too and while Tony can’t say he’s surprised to learn that Thor is a cuddler, he doesn’t have to be happy about it.

There’s a flash of light.

For a moment, in his sleep-puzzled state, Tony is unsure what that means. Then it occurs to him that it means something weird. He shoves himself upwards into a seating position, pushing off Thor’s arm as he does, and rubs his eyes. On either side of him, his bedmates are stirring.

Then he looks up.

‘Whu-?’

‘Hi Tony,’ says Rhodey. He has a shit-eating grin. He has a shit-eating grin and his phone out. His brand new Stark phone with a top-of-the-range camera.

‘Delete that,’ says Tony. ‘Delete all of that. Right now!’

Rhodey’s grin widens. ‘Gotta go, Tony, see you later!’ He practically sprints away. 

Tony scrambles out of bed and stumbles after his so-called best friend. ‘ _Rhodey!_ Jarvis, where’d he- Wha-!’ He smacks right into Jane Foster at the now open door to the bunker and sends both of them toppling to the ground.

‘What the hell, Tony?’ Jane demands, glaring at him and rubbing her ass. She’s holding a relatively hefty tablet with one hand and Tony is briefly worried he’s about to get brained with it.

‘Uh, sorry. Rhodey?’

‘Where’s Thor?’ 

‘He’s back there but that is _so much less important_ than Rhodey. Where the hell has-?’

‘Thor!’ Jane beams upwards. Thor leans down and pulls her to her feet. They gaze at each other soppily. 

Tony groans and shut his eyes. Rhodey is the worst best friend ever. Everything is terrible.

‘Tony!’

‘Pep?’ He opens his eyes. She’s wrapped a sheet around herself like some sort of Greek goddess, which is slightly more effort than either Thor or himself have put into their modesty.

‘Tokyo. I need a Quinjet or I’ll never make it in time.’ Pepper reaches down, takes his hand, and heaves. Tony goes, because it seems like the path of least resistance. And because Thor is kissing Jane and he wants to get away from them both, and quickly.

‘But… Rhodey… I need to…’ He gestures ineffectively towards where he thinks Rhodey might be.

Pepper ignores him and begins to march him in the other direction. ‘Look, Rhodey’s just going to have his fun showing Steve and Nat-’

‘Oh, great, because that’s exactly what I-’

‘-And it’s hardly the most embarrassing image of you he or anyone with the internet could get their hands on-’

‘That’s not the point!’

‘- _And_ he knows how much of a struggle managing Stark has been for me with the press and our relationship. He’s not going to share it more widely, if only because I’m in it and he’s too nice for that. Plus he’s a highly respected Air Force colonel, not some tabloid journalist.’

‘But Pepper…!’

‘Tony,’ she says. ‘Go. Now. Clothes. Quinjet. If you can get me to Tokyo in…’ She pulls out her phone to check the time, ‘under six hours, then that leaves us with a comfortable two hours in a very nice hotel with a properly sized bed before I even have to start getting ready.’ She gives him _that_ smile, and leans over to kiss the corner of his mouth.

‘Oh,’ says Tony. He swallows. Rhodey embarrassing him to the other Avengers suddenly seems less like a problem. ‘Well. When you put it like that...’ He feels himself begin to smile.

‘Good,’ says Pepper firmly. ‘Now come and get some clothes on.’ Tony’s grins widens and he follows her to their rooms.

~*~

As Pepper pointed out, Rhodey has too much respect for her leadership of Stark Industries and is too highly ranked in the Air Force to publish a picture of her, Tony and Thor sharing a bed on the internet.

That’s why he crops Pepper out so it’s just Tony and Thor cuddling in bed, and has Barton post it instead.

Tony is definitely going to make Rhodey and Barton pay when he gets the chance. He’s leaning towards locking them both in a bunker with Thor and Jane for a day, but he’s not sure anyone deserves that. He’s got a whole impromptu Japanese vacation with Pepper to occupy him, though, so he doesn’t have to rush into it. Instead he can get drunk off sake and plot his revenge while Pepper’s working, and then when she’s done making billions of dollars for their company, romance her with a private helicopter tour up Mount Fuji and a hotel room with a bed that is finally big enough.

It’s kinda turns out worth it in the end, for all the extra time with Pep, even with the stupid picture. Not that he’s going to admit that to _anyone_.


End file.
